just another entry

Well, I'm alil irratated at the moment cause either my comp or AOL FUCKIN BLOWS MAD DONKEY BALLS! but aside from that, i got home from work maybe alil over an hour ago. I had to take the fuckin bus home which I don't mind so much anymore. Its relaxing and I ran into an old friend so we got to chit chat till my stop. It was good to see her again. Seems like shes one of the few from my past doin good. So i'm glad to see that. Were gunna keep in touch every now and again. As for work, I had fun, I made the kids from the schools today pick up the skates for me for prizes. They were like mugging other kids of there skates, it was funny. 2 of em actually dragged a kid of his bench tryin to pull his skates off. I was amused today and over all had a goodday thus far unlike yesterday which was such a damn dull day. Since tommorow is my only day off for this week I gotta go out tonight. The hard part is thinkin about who i want to pay a visit to. I know I don't want to go to Kenny's house. Thats for damn sure. So I figure maybe I'll hang out with Sean, Danielle and James tonight. Haven't seen them in a bit. I just finished a few lessons of my school work. Just a few steps closer to gettin that god damn diploma so I can move on. That be'z all. Peace.

ELI, STOP BEING A JACKASS!

I shouldnt be pissed over an old close friend of hers. I know how it is to be in and out of touch but still have the friendship there. And if it survives over time then its worth keeping. I dont own u brenna so u have the freedom to do as u please. Even if i get dumb about it. I'm sorry. Thanks to all that are able to put up with me. You all deserve a reward. But all you get is my graditude....thank you all. And Brenna...I love you and that won't change.

Yer damn fuckin right im fuckin jealous! thats just me

I'm the jealouse type without a doubt. I am extremly protective as well. The 2 go hand and hand, don't they? I get angry when my girlfriend chooses to talk to some other guy instead of me. Is that wrong of me? Ok, maybe the first time I can deal. But twice in one day, and for the same dude? nope, sorry...that makes me mad. I can't stop what angers me, all i can do is tone it down. Do I trust Brenna? Without a doubt. So why get so angry you ask? Cause I can't fucking help it. After being cheated on by 2 girls I cared about at the time it kinda grows on you, u know? Am I saying I think ima get played again? no. But can I help the jelousy that has become apart of me? no to that too. Am I in the wrong if i can't help it? maybe...sorry for being me.

Its allllllllllll gravy

I got off the phone with Bren Bren not to long ago. I just gotta tone down the thinking so much. We had a very good conversation. Then it got..........to good (lol)She was tryin to turn me on (and doing a very good job at it might i had) and I kept tellin her to stop but when that girl gets in one of her moods....whew, watch it. Then of course my granny walked in while Brenna was playin naughty. THANK GOD i was on my stomach, lol. And thank god i didnt give in to her evvvvvvvvvvvvvvvil. Then I had to get off the phone eventually. Me and my grandma had a real good conversation too which was suprising cause we dont really talk much. Well, atleast I don't. Now I'm about to do my schoolin but i decided to call Brenna first. Shes getting some well deserved rest right now. Welp, thats all....lataZ

a break

Well, after work yesterday I went home and was there for no more than 1 min, then I got a call from Bren while I was sprawled out face down on the living room floor. First off, work was cool. Wish I could say the same for Alyssa and Jackie tho. Alyssa got a real bicthin, as did i but I took it alil better. And Jackie got fired and she cried hysterically. She asked for my number and ran off. Instead of workin the ring, i worked the front. Which sucked BUT made time go alot faster and my managers actually complimented me on my preformance. !?!?!?! thats rare. But anywho, it was the final work day of my full working week. Thank god I can finally just relax alil. Anywayz, I went with Brenna and her mom which wasn't kosher on my part for a number of reaons. 1: I promised Heather I'd take her out for her birthday 2:my grandma who is leaving soon prepared a feast for me 3:i wanted alil rest before i did anthing cause I was tired and grumpy.4:I was invited to go bowling with a bunch of people from work and said I would be home to take the call. But I didnt tell Brenna because I felt I'd make her mad. That was stupid on my part, shes not obsessive or anything so she wouldnt flip so i shoulda just spit it out. As Alyssa said to me..."grow sum balls". So from now on, I'll say what I feel when I feel it cause if i don't speak up I won't have the best time. Hanging out with Bren wasnt a disaster but I should of been else where and with that guilt in my head the whole time I was pretty bitter. But kept that inside. So when I got the ride home I kinda let it out the wrong way at Brenna. I misworded what was wrong but totally fucked that up. Later I explained and apologized. All is well. That fear is growing tho...the fear that she doesnt feel the same about me anymore but this is the type of paranio shit that I think up all the time cause I'm stupid like that. I sumtimes think I don't make her happy, bu how can I when I don't open up to her? So live and learn. I am looking foward to the next time I see her. As of now, who knows what i'll do. School work n' study the drivers book and maybe even take a spin. Thats all for now.

The day didnt turn out so damn bad after all

Work was dramatic as always but cool at the same time. Me and Bud had alot of laughs together. We were friggin insane, lol. "Damn that fisher price bus! zoinks!" with our combined efforts we were able to destroy a kiddie toy. Hehe, hey! that was one tough ass toy dude! it took like 20+ stabs with a screwdriver to kill it! and I destroyed the jazzersize ladies stupid lil green box full of there shit cause I found out its been them throwin our skates on the floor. And we get in trouble for that. Me and Stacy got in ANOTHER HUGE argument but in the end as always we settled it. I don't like that girl, but i can't hate her either. All in all, over all today was good. Ok, maybe I flipped alil over the whole thing with Matt. In all honesty, I trust Brenna and love her to death. And I feel there is no competition between us. Espeacially after me and her hung out today. After me and her spend time together I feel so....rejuvenated. Its a wonderful feeling. Its amazing how much I love her. No reason to get into details but we had a great time...talking and otherwise. And my family adores her and my grandmother says shes very pretty. I was like, PRETTY? thats an understatment!

fighting urge to kill

Talking to Matt, (soooo happy to have my right hand man back, Awwwwww yeaaah, my boy rox hardcore. When I get up to NY, or he comes back down here, watch out we'll take you all out.)That would be my girlfriend talkin. Then I read her comments sum if the shit that Matt fellow said. Fighting urge to kill. Am I just being stupid to be jelouse? I trust her but of course this shits gunna bother me. I'll speak more of my day later. Not in the best mood at the moment.